I’m with Ashleigh (see May 09 post). May has been a fabulous month so far. Sure, it’s been raining cats and dogs here, but I could care less. My internal life has been radiant.

My muse, that part of my psyche who blesses me with flashes of brilliance at his whim, has been especially generous. I powered through the first one hundred pages of a new book (a very long proposal) without a single speed bump. He filled my waking dreams with enough fodder for the starts of several other projects, and my sleeping dreams have been satisfyingly vivid and intriguing.

Let me tell you about the dream I had last night.

I was leaving a shopping mall, juggling my purse and an infant in my arms. As soon as I left the glass doors and stepped into the parking lot, I was standing on beach, a long crescent of white sand rimming a pale blue sea. In front of me lay several blue dolphins and albino-skinned men with no genitalia (the men, that is). They all appeared to have washed ashore and I thought them dead, but one of the large, genitalia-challenged men leaned up on an elbow and pointed to the sky. He said, “Just wait a minute.”

I glanced up and saw more dolphins and dickless white men falling from the sky. Of course, I backed up on the beach, staring. Then large bubbles started floating down, and when they were just above my head, I saw that each one had a translucent face.

The albino who had spoken to me rose and approached me, staring at the child in my arms. When he met my gaze, his expression seemed sad. He turned away, bent at the waist and vomited a glob of clear gel, which he held out to me. “Take it. You need to smear this all over you.”

I was shocked but took the glob, staring at it and wondering if I should tell the alien I didn’t want his huge lugey.

One bubble popped on a man who walked up beside me, and he began to scrape at the goo stuck to his face. When he straightened, his expression grew blank. His eyes blinked and turned a burning yellow. His mouth opened and revealed a row of jagged teeth behind his human ones and surrounding a round, tunnel-like throat.

Intuitively, I knew the giant lugey was going to keep me from turning into an alien zombie, so I handed the alien the baby and quickly rubbed it all over me while more bubbles popped all around me.

The dream ended there, but I got curious. What was my crazy-assed muse trying to tell me? I borrowed my daughter’s dream dictionary and came up with this:

•      Infant—may express an unconscious desire for a baby. Oh, hell no! Or it may represent a new development in myself. I’m always eager for new parts of me to creep up and greet me in the mirror.
•      Sea-side Beach—the place where the conscious and the unconscious meet. Uh, yeah.
•      Blue Dolphins— Blue: the collective unconscious; a live dolphin might symbolize communication between the unconscious and the conscious. Maybe I just need to drink myself into a stupor and this will all make sense.
•      Dickless White Men—Not surprising, I didn’t find anything under “dickless white men”. So I looked up men, which might represent the male side of my psyche. Why I castrated that side of me, I have no clue.
•      Bubble Faces—Nothing under “bubble” or “face”. Now this is going to drive me crazy. What does it all mean?
•      Aliens—Hmmm. “A person of foreign appearance…may represent some part of your psyche which is unfamiliar to you…get acquainted with that foreign part of yourself.” So I guess I was doing the right thing when I rubbed the lugey all over my body.
•      Giant Lugey—I was dying to figure out what this part meant. But it shall remain a mystery. No “lugey” or “bodily fluid” mentioned in the dictionary. It was clear like water—water might symbolize psychic energy. It felt like jelly. Nope, nothing under jelly. Will have to write the author to tell him his book has serious gaps of information.  

So put it all together and what does it mean? I haven’t a bloody clue. Of course now I’m wondering if I’d stayed long enough in the dream, would I have discovered that the lugey was the alien’s come and smearing it on me might have impregnated me?